So how am I doing with the Creativity Workshop? It’s been almost two weeks since my last CW post, and I’ve barely posted anything else, either. What happened?
Stagefright. Yup, I had stagefright. My blogging buddies seemed SO eager (thanks for the vote of confidence!) to follow my foray into the diabolical — and I didn’t want to disappoint them (or me). But every time I sat down at the computer to get down, dirty and diabolical, I clenched. I blanched. I lost my voice and stared, trembling, into the microphone — er, keyboard. And I walked off the stage for a couple of days.
My Inner Editor held a kitten instead of a butcher knife. I wanted to channel Sweeney Todd, not Lola Cat. But it wasn’t happening. I tried blaming it on the heat, the humidity. But it was stagefright — I didn’t think I could live up to anyone’s (including my own) expectations for diabolical thinking — and I clenched.
And then a miracle happened: Early this week I took my car to get new tires and brakes. I know some of you find your muse in Starbucks, but I found mine among the display of steel belted radials, shock absorbers, and NASCAR jerseys. I sat there with my laptop and started pounding out weird, edgy stuff. Don’t know where it was coming from, where it was going — but my stagefright lifted. Maybe it was comfort with performing on a street corner instead of at the Met.
So, yeah, I’ve pounded out a couple of shorts this week and stretched in some new, darker directions.
heh heh. You better watch your back.
… just sayin’…